People very often confuse assertiveness with aggressiveness.
Assertiveness is being firm in our stance and gentle with the person we are dealing with. We can be nice and respectful while being assertive.
It is important that we be assertive in our actions and words. Assertiveness is being independent, honest and in control.
In assertiveness we state
Facts
Figures
Feelings
Needs
Requests
We don’t blame
We don’t bring up past grievances
We don’t complain
We don’t judge
We don’t shame
We don’t taunt
We don’t compare
We keep repeating over and over again to be heard.
And to be heard we need to listen and validate as well.
In assertiveness we be direct and upfront.
We be very precise and concise.
We don’t hide or twist things. Though we can be tactful and use our knowledge of the person’s temperament.
Munira Ahmed
PRC Founder